About

This website is for new caregivers taking care of their parent(s) or even those with experience. It contains notes and insight
from my personal journey which may be different than yours. Together, we can all learn from and help one another
get through the uplifting yet exhausting adventure of caring for a loved one in their final stages of life.

If you told me when I was a kid that one day my father would live with me and I’d be changing his diapers, tending his finances, managing his medical care, overseeing caregivers, and so much more - I would have said you were absolutely crazy. That there was no way on this planet that would ever happen. And yet, here I am, doing it all and then some.

It all started back in 2013 when he was 83 and started showing significant signs of decline. Neither my siblings nor I lived in the same state. My siblings visited him about once a year, but I was in town much more frequently for work and saw first hand as problems began to emerge. Dad and I began to discuss his options and under review of My mother died from early onset Alzheimer’s in 2000 and Dad’s vision of a nursing home was quite dismal, as was mine. Trying to convince him to leave the house he’d been in for forty-five years and go into any type of care facility was impossible, so other options had to be considered.

My three siblings were unable to relocate so getting their assistance was not an option. As luck would have it, my husband was able to move half way across the country for work, and I was finally in a position where I could work from anywhere so we sold our house, packed up and planned to be nearby to assist. Then in another twist of fate, we decided to remodel the house I grew up in, the one he was living in, so he could age in place safely and be “carried out in a box” as per his wishes. It all seemed perfectly logical at the time.

It took two years to empty my childhood home of the excess he had accumulated, then he moved into our tiny rental and work on the house began. Two years later, we moved into our completed, accessible home and the adventure continued.

Not going to lie, there are days when I have a little regret for the decision we made. Despite the experience I had with my mom and her Alzheimer’s, I could not have predicted how physically and emotionally exhausting being the primary caregiver of my father would be. I could not have known how restricted my life would become. How dependent he would be. How long he would live. How many other people I’d have to share my home with. How I would have to fight for privacy and private time. How much strain would be put on my marriage. Hindsight, it was the right thing to do, and both my husband and I agree, if we had to make the decision knowing what we do now, we would do it again.

This website / journal / blog is just a glimpse into my caregiving journey. It is a way for me to share my experiences in the thought that perhaps it might help others. I share all the emotions that come with this journey - happy, sad, angry and everything in between.

This is caregiving.

With love & gratitude for this opportunity,

Laurie